Tag Archives: half marathon

Running from Math Teachers

Being a mom, I’ve decided, is a lot like signing up for an ultramarathon you don’t remember registering for, on a course no one has accurately mapped, with an elevation chart drawn by a drunk cartographer.

There are moments when the sun hits just right, the road opens up, and you think, “This. This is why people do this.” And then, about three minutes later, you’re in a ditch, tying your shoe with one hand while trying not to cry into your Gatorade.

That’s motherhood for me.

I love it. I hate it. Simultaneously. In the same way I love and hate mile 17 of a long run—far enough in that you can’t turn back, not far enough that you can see the finish line, fully committed and questioning every life choice that led you here.

Here’s the part people get weird about: if I had to choose motherhood again, I wouldn’t. There, I said it. Not because I don’t adore my kids—because I do. Fiercely. If it came down to it, I would step in front of anything for them, no hesitation. I show up for them, I take care of them, I push for what they need. They are, without question, the most important part of my life.

But if we’re talking about some cosmic do-over button? Knowing what I know now about sleep deprivation, emotional whiplash, and the sheer volume of sticky surfaces? I’m not sure I’d sign up for this particular race again.

And yet, here I am—bib pinned on, shoes laced, in it for the long game.

My kids bring me so much wonder and joy it feels like hitting that perfect runner’s high: the world sharpened, the air brighter, the sense that maybe, just maybe, I can do hard things. Then, ten minutes later, they bring anger, self-doubt, and anxiety—like realizing you misread the route and there’s another hill you didn’t plan for.

The mental part of parenting is the real endurance test. It’s not the packing lunches or the laundry; it’s the constant, gnawing question: Am I doing right by them? Am I screwing this up? It’s that voice that pipes up around mile 8 and mile 13 and mile 21: Are you sure you can finish this?

This week, that voice had company.

My oldest is in 5th grade, but he’s taking 6th grade math. He’s already finished that curriculum, so he’s been moved on to 7th grade content, most of which lives in a program called MATHia. Picture it as the treadmill of math: technically useful, but not especially inspiring, and you’re never entirely sure if anyone’s actually running the thing.

In my opinion, there hasn’t been a lot of actual teaching happening—more like supervised screen time with occasional math problems.

So when his teacher emailed to imply he wasn’t doing his assigned work this week, I felt my heart rate spike like I’d just started sprinting intervals. Then I noticed she’d copied the middle school principal.

Not his principal. Not his building. A completely different principal.

It was like getting a race DNF email from a race director for an event you didn’t even run.

The rage I felt in that moment could have powered the school’s lights for a week. I had just spoken to her last week about how he’d moved on to the next set of lessons. Now she was telling me he wasn’t doing work tied to lessons he had finished weeks ago—work that had only been officially assigned in the last two weeks.

So let me get this straight: he’s ahead, he’s done the material, and we’re mad because he isn’t pretending to still be on mile 4 when he’s already cruising at mile 9?

Absolutely not.

This is where the running metaphor and motherhood collide: I can tolerate a lot when it comes to my own race. I can handle blisters, bad weather, bad pacing, and poor decisions involving mid-race snacks. But when it comes to my kids, I turn into the runner who will absolutely march over to the race director and calmly, clearly, with a polite smile, demand to know why the course was mis-marked.

Motherhood is a marathon, sure—but no one talks enough about how messy the middle miles are. The beginning is all enthusiasm and new shoes. The end is finish-line photos and relief. The middle miles are where the doubts live. Where your pace slips. Where you negotiate with yourself: Just get to the next mile marker. Just make it to bedtime. Just answer this one email from the teacher without setting anything on fire.

In those middle miles, things get complicated. Teachers misunderstand. Kids get ahead or fall behind. You second-guess yourself hourly. You try to advocate without overreacting, to push without bulldozing, to support without smothering. You’re tired. You hurt. You keep going anyway.

But here’s one thing I’m certain of, even when nothing else feels clear: my kids will always feel my love. They will know, without a doubt, that I will stand up for them, even if my hands are shaking when I hit “send” on the email. They will know I am in their corner, whether the problem is long division, a MATHia module, or something much bigger down the road.

I may not have chosen this race if I’d seen the whole route ahead of time. But I’m running it. Every day. Some miles are ugly, some are beautiful, most are a strange blend of both. And as long as I’m on this course, my kids will know one thing for sure:

Their mom is still moving forward. Still showing up. Still fighting for them.

Even when she’d really, really like a water stop, a pacer, and maybe a new course map.

Running from the Old Me

How did I—a reasonably sane 42-year-old woman who once fancied herself a college athlete—end up screeching across the dinner table, “Stop saying buttcrack, for the love of God”? It’s a fair question, and the answer, I’m afraid, is that life has a way of sprinting ahead while you’re still lacing up your trainers. None of it was my doing. Not a single humiliating, heart-stopping mile. Call me stubborn if you must, but let me trot out the evidence like so many rogue blisters on a marathoner’s heel.

Exhibit A: Compartment Syndrome, My Five-Year Nemesis (2001–2005)
Ah, college volleyball glory days—until my legs decided to rebel. Chronic compartment syndrome: too much muscle crammed into too small a sheath, swelling like overpacked luggage on a redeye flight. I could barely hobble off the court, pain radiating like I’d run a marathon barefoot over coals. Surgery in 2002? Fizzled like a dud firework. The punchline? I was too fit. My body, that traitorous overachiever, had outgrown its own packaging. Who knew ambition could literally cramp your style?

Exhibit B: The Husband Who Strayed (2015—or Whenever the Heck It Ended)
End of June 2015, baby in arms, no maternity leave, husband off on noble recruiting trips like the dedicated coach he was. Or so I thought. What should have been a relay race through early parenthood turned into a solitary slog through betrayal’s mud pit. The fallout? A wound that festers still, quite possibly the hidden accelerant to that later stroke. Life’s curveballs don’t come with batting practice.

Exhibit C: The NICU Marathon (January 1–21, 2018)
Why my body treats pregnancy like a bad blind date—bolting for the exit before the appetizers arrive—is one of life’s more baffling mysteries. My babies always emerge from the chaos strong, healthy, and perfect as polished trophies, yet my womb seems to regard the whole affair as an unwelcome intrusion, ejecting its precious cargo weeks ahead of schedule. It’s a wretched mismatch, like a marathoner cursed with shoes two sizes too small. That premature arrival turned our world into a 21-day gauntlet of beeping monitors, tiny incubators, and the kind of bone-deep terror that makes every sunrise feel like borrowed time. Touch-and-go doesn’t begin to cover it. He’s thriving now, of course—my little sprinter, outpacing the odds—but those NICU nights remain the slowest, most grueling miles I’ve ever logged.

Exhibit D: The Stroke That Came Out of Nowhere (March 24, 2022)
Picture this: six weeks postpartum, fit as a fiddle, no vices to speak of. I’d never smoked, rarely sipped, and my cholesterol was so pristine you could frame it. Doctors poked and prodded, shrugged their white-coated shoulders, and declared it cryptogenic—a fancy word for “beats us.” Just one of those cosmic pratfalls, like tripping over your own shadow mid-stride. No warning, no fault, just a brain misfiring while I was still catching my breath from new-mom life.

Exhibit E: AFib’s Electrical Gremlins (January 19, 2025)
One ordinary Sunday, my heart decides it’s auditioning for a techno rave. Electrical system gone haywire—no clogged pipes, no dietary sins, no excess poundage. Just faulty wiring in the old ticker, demanding a hospital marathon and surgical pit stop. Here I am, patched up and plodding on, wondering if my body’s secretly plotting a mutiny.

I could keep lapping this track—miscarriages, job upheavals, the daily gauntlet of boy-mom chaos—but what’s the point? Running from everything has left me winded, circling the same bruised shin. No more. I’m grabbing the baton, plotting a new course, even if the map’s half-sketched. Because here’s the truth I’ve pounded into my skull on a thousand solo jogs: you don’t outrun life’s ambushes by fleeing faster. You lace up tighter, pick your stride, and charge toward whatever finish line you damn well choose. Buttcrack or no buttcrack.

Running from Everything: The August Marathon

Here in the thick of August, we find ourselves on the last, long lap of summer—the kind you run when you can both see the finish line and also suspect it might, in fact, be moving further away every time you glance up. In our house, the new school year is lurking just around the last bend: two weeks for the kids, but my husband and I are up for a head start with students next week. If this were a Disney race, we’d already have hit the castle, gotten distracted by a Dole Whip, and realized we still have to finish.

I work all summer, so my personal schedule doesn’t change much—it’s the unremarkable “Tomorrowland Speedway” of routines: reliable, uninspired, and a little too loud. But my husband and our kids? Their summer is pure Magic Kingdom chaos: rope drop every morning, parades all day, fireworks every night. Bedtime and wake-up times are more like vague suggestions, as if the laws of time only apply to mortals living outside the borders of summer vacation.

But race director that I am, I know better than to let the “RunDisney After Party” lifestyle run all the way to the start line of school. With two weeks left, I’ve activated the dreaded Operation: Earlier Bedtimes, much to the dismay of the crew who have become accustomed to living like nocturnal pirates. If I don’t do this now, the first day of school will look less like the opening moments of a Disney half marathon and more like the “balloon ladies” coming for anyone left at the back.

To try and restore balance (or at least fake it long enough to get us to the first bell), I’m putting us all on a reentry plan worthy of any Dopey Challenge: one room gets cleaned each day, one load of laundry run, and there’s a loose attempt at meal planning, in between the usual nutritional gambit of “Is this leftover pizza or the lost-and-found churro from last week?” I know this will pay off with more evenings free for kid activities, maybe even some peaceful runs around the neighborhood—my solo laps through the EPCOT of suburban life, waving to neighbors like we’re all characters in some elaborate parade.

Most days, I’m just trying to help my kids (and myself) become finishers in the marathon of “life skills.” The goal isn’t perfection; it’s having options. I want my kids to try gymnastics, football, science club, trombone—whatever piques their curiosity, like a list of Genie+ reservations: the more you sample, the better your story. Back in my day, exploring wasn’t so easy, and specializing was rarely a choice. I’ve found that being a jack-of-all-trades and a master of none has gotten me far: kind of like being able to race all four Disney parks, rather than winning one. In my career and as a coach, I see again and again that it’s the kids who diversify—who build different muscles, learn from new experiences, and sometimes even get a little lost along the way—who really go the distance.

And that’s what I’m aiming for: a family ready not just for school, but for the miles and magic that come after the starting gun sounds.

Running from MRI Season: Another Lap Around the Track

Since 2022, I’ve had a standing date with an MRI machine every year—my own personal Groundhog Day, except instead of a rodent predicting the weather, it’s a giant magnet peering into my brain and predicting, well, me. The scans always show the same old stroke souvenirs (thanks for the memories, 2022!), but otherwise, things have been reassuringly uneventful until last week.

This year’s MRI landed on Juneteenth, which, if nothing else, makes for a memorable calendar entry. Normally, I handle my time in “the cage” with the stoicism of a runner at mile 18—uncomfortable, yes, but nothing I can’t power through. But this time, I had a hunch things would be different. Not fear, exactly. More like that feeling you get in the last quarter-mile of a race when you know something’s off with your stride. You’re not sure what, but you know.

A few hours later, the results dropped, and—cue the dramatic music—my hunch was right. White Matter Hyperintensity. Left frontal lobe. The start of Small Vessel Disease—a phrase that hovers ominously, hinting at the possibility of dementia down the road, like those balloon ladies at the back of a marathon, always just behind you, no matter how hard you push. But honestly, I wasn’t surprised. My body has been sending up distress flares for months, and I’ve been logging the symptoms like a runner logs miles:

  • Vision doing its own thing
  • Words playing hide-and-seek in my brain
  • Short-term memory that’s, well, short
  • Blood pressure so low it could limbo under a garden hose (88/56, if you’re keeping score)
  • Insomnia that only Trazodone can tame
  • Mood swings that make Boston’s Heartbreak Hill look like a bunny slope
  • Depression and anxiety, the unwelcome running buddies
  • Heart rate dropping to 49 bpm—elite marathoner numbers, but without the medals
  • Dizzy spells and vision blackouts whenever I stand up (or, you know, attempt yoga)
  • 15 pounds lost in 2 months (if only it were from marathon training)
  • Balance so wobbly, I could be running on cobblestones in Rome

It’s been a slow, sneaky build—like overtraining, but without the endorphin highs. At one point, I was convinced I had early-onset Parkinson’s. I talked to my therapist, journaled about it, and notified not one, not two, but four doctors. The collective medical response? Order another MRI. (Doctors, it turns out, are like race marshals: quick to hand you a cup of water, but not so quick to notice you’re limping.)

Yesterday, my neurologist’s PA emailed me: “No new signs of stroke!”—complete with a cheery smiley face. I suppose that’s meant to be reassuring, but when you’re the one living with the symptoms (and the new MRI findings), it feels a bit like being told, “Great job, you finished the race!” when you know you took a wrong turn at mile 10.

So here I am, left to manage the aftermath. I’m the one who can’t remember which kid I’m yelling for, or why there’s pizza on the wall, or how to explain to my husband that the three-year-old’s culinary experiments are not, in fact, a sign of genius. Losing your train of thought all day is exhausting—like being stuck in an endless training cycle with no taper in sight. No finish line, no medal, just more laps.

And that’s the real question, isn’t it? If you already know what the race result will be, is it worth running? I’m not saying I won’t toe the start line. Runners are stubborn like that. But knowing the suffering ahead, you do wonder: Is it worth it?

Maybe that’s the point. We run not because we know the outcome, but because we don’t. Because every mile, every scan, every day is a chance to surprise ourselves. And sometimes, even when the course is tough and the finish line is uncertain, you just keep running from everything—if only to see what’s around the next bend to scare the hell out of you.

Running from Little Green Men

As a self-proclaimed Walt Disney World expert—meaning I can tell you the exact number of churros you can eat before you lose the will to live—one of my favorite corners of the parks is Toy Story Land. Nestled in Disney’s Hollywood Studios (which, let’s be honest, will always be MGM Studios to those of us who remember the Backlot Tour and the inexplicable presence of a Golden Girls house), this is the place where you get to be a toy for the day. It’s all giant building blocks, oversized board game pieces, and a healthy dose of nostalgia. It’s like stepping into your childhood, only with more sunscreen and slightly more expensive snacks.

Now, as a parent, my mission is to bring a little of that magic home, specifically, to the boys’ bathroom. Yes, you heard me: I am attempting to transform the most utilitarian room in the house into a Toy Story-themed wonderland. I have plans. Big plans. Beadboard! Wallpaper! Window coverings! Hanging monkeys! (The plastic kind, not the real ones. I’m not that ambitious.) I want it to be colorful, kid-friendly, and the kind of place where you half-expect Woody to pop out from behind the shower curtain and remind you to wash your hands.

But here’s the thing: the only thing standing between me and this Pixar-inspired paradise is, well, me. And a lack of power tools. And possibly a healthy fear of accidentally nailing my own foot to the floor.

What I really want—what I yearn for—is a mitre saw. And a jigsaw. And a nail gun. I want to be the kind of person who uses phrases like “orbital sander” in casual conversation and actually knows what it means. I want home projects to be my hobby, not just something I watch on YouTube with a mixture of awe and mild terror.

But here’s the secret Disney never tells you: learning something new, whether it’s how to wield a nail gun or how to navigate Genie+, is a lot like training for a marathon.

Stay with me here. When you decide to run a marathon (or, in my case, when you decide to run away from everything and end up in a marathon by accident), you don’t just lace up your shoes and jog 26.2 miles. You start small. You run a block. You wheeze. You Google “can you die from running?” You keep going. Over time, you get a little stronger, a little faster, and a little more confident that you won’t collapse in a heap by mile two.

Learning a new skill—like transforming a bathroom into Andy’s room, or figuring out how to use a mitre saw without losing a finger—is the same way. It’s about taking baby steps. You watch a video. You read an article. You buy a tool and stare at it for a week, wondering if you need a permit just to plug it in. You make mistakes. You learn. You get a little better. Eventually, you’re not just surviving—you’re thriving. Or at least you’re not actively endangering yourself or others.

So, as I stand in the doorway of the boys’ bathroom, armed with nothing but enthusiasm and a vague idea of how wallpaper works, I remind myself: this is my marathon. There will be setbacks. There will be questionable design choices. There will almost certainly be paint on the ceiling. But with each small step, I’m getting closer to creating a space that’s as magical as Toy Story Land—minus the crowds and the $6 sodas.

And who knows? Maybe someday I’ll be the kind of person who can say “orbital sander” with confidence. Or at least with fewer power tool-related injuries.

Until then, I’ll keep running from everything—except my dreams of a Toy Story bathroom.

Have you tackled a Disney-inspired home project? Or survived a marathon (literal or metaphorical)? Share your stories below! And if you have tips for using a mitre saw, please send help.

Running Back to the Saddle

In the crisp autumn air of Indianapolis, with leaves crunching underfoot and the promise of adventure hanging thick as morning fog, I found myself standing at the starting line of the Indianapolis Half Marathon. It was October 2023, and I was about to embark on a 13.1-mile journey through the heart of the Hoosier capital, a feat that seemed as improbable as finding a cowboy riding a horse down Broadway in New York City.

You see, dear reader, this wasn’t just any race for me. Oh no, this was my first major foray into the world of competitive shuffling since a rather inconvenient stroke had decided to pop by for an extended stay in my brain. Here I was, a former college athlete who once squatted small cars for breakfast, now questioning whether I could manage a brisk walk to the corner store without keeling over.

But let me tell you about the ingenious decision I made, one that would make even the most seasoned race veteran nod in approval. I splurged on the opportunity to start my day in the hallowed halls of the Indiana State House. Picture it: while other poor souls were huddled outside like penguins in a snowstorm, I was stretching my questionable limbs in the warm embrace of democracy, munching on a breakfast that didn’t come wrapped in tinfoil. It was a stroke of brilliance if you’ll pardon the pun.

As I waddled to the starting line, a mere stone’s throw from my cozy State House sanctuary, I couldn’t help but feel a twinge of panic. Had I trained enough? Was I still the same person who had once pushed out babies with the ease of a vending machine dispensing snacks? The identity crisis loomed larger than the giant timing clock ticking away mercilessly above our heads.

The race began, and to my utter astonishment, I found myself running. Not the graceful gazelle-like strides of my youth, mind you, but a determined shuffle that would make any powerwalker proud. For five glorious miles, I was unstoppable. That is until my right shoe decided it had had enough of this foolishness and came untied.

Now, dear reader, picture if you will, a somewhat disheveled woman bent over a curb, fingers swollen to the size of small sausages, attempting to tie a shoelace. It was a sight so pitiful that a kind stranger took pity and performed the task for me. I briefly considered asking them to carry me the rest of the way, but my pride (what was left of it) wouldn’t allow it.

The next few miles were a blur of monotony, broken only by the occasional cheer from a spectator who had clearly mistaken me for someone else. But as we approached mile 10, something magical happened. We found ourselves running alongside the race’s overachievers – those annoyingly fit individuals who were already finishing. It was both inspiring and mildly infuriating.

As I crossed the finish line, my boys waiting with expressions that were equal parts pride and “can we go home now?”, I wanted to shout from the rooftops about my triumph over adversity. But instead, I settled for an internal victory dance, and the knowledge that I had, indeed, proven something to myself.

In the end, as I hobbled what felt like another half marathon to reach our parked car, I realized that toughness comes in many forms. Sometimes it’s squatting small buildings, and sometimes it’s putting one foot in front of the other when your brain has other ideas. And since that realization has landed me in therapy, well, at least I have plenty to talk about.

Disappointment

6aabc67294ffc8340787ba5e8ca77022Well, 2 days ago was supposed to be my big Swagtastic Half Marathon. I was so excited about it. I ate very well the 2 days before the race. I hydrated. I laid out my clothing the night before and placed my gels in my running belt. I was ready to go.

Wednesday morning the alarm went off at 5:00 am, and the coffee maker started running. I got all ready, had a small cup of coffee and an english muffin with peanut butter, and while I didn’t feel great, I was still excited to get moving. I started out fast, keeping my miles under 12 minutes, which is a record for me. Mile one went by, mile two was ok, but by the time I got to mile three, I felt extremely winded, exhausted and started chilled. By 3.5 miles, I was shaking so back that I wasn’t running in a straight line. I stopped at mile four.

I am so disappointed in myself, but the truth of the matter is that I have been very sick. I had a fever most of the 4th of July, lots of chest congestion and a bad cough. The worst part is that I was on pace to beat my half marathon PR by 10 minutes.

Oh well… Life goes on, and so does my training. I hope to get back on the road by the first of the week, and we will try again on Labor Day.

A Good End to a Challenging Week

I had a rough week. You could probably tell by my last post. But fortunately it has ended better than it began. I feel like I have really gotten my running on track this week, which is good, because I have a half marathon on Thursday. I am very excited about it actually, and I am working on my game plan to make sure I am prepared. I am hoping to finish in under 2:42:15, as that was my time at the Disney World Marathon… I finished in 2:45:05 for the Half Marathon, and then ran faster the next day… oddly enough.

I’ll keep you updated on this week’s progress…

Walt Disney World Half Marathon Review

Half Marathon CourseI am super excited, because I have been waiting for almost 2 months now to give you a review of the Disney World Marathon and Half Marathon. The reason for the delay is that I have been waiting to get my marathon photos. The CD arrived today, and I am happy to share them with my blog readers.

After a 2 am wake up call, we arrived at Epcot  just before 3. When a race starts at 5:35 am, you have to get going pretty early to be ready to run 13.1 miles. After weaving my way through a very congested pre-race area, I walked the near mile trail to the start line to wait in a corral for another hour. The pre-race process at Disney is very taxing! I finally crossed the start line about 6:05 am, and the congested feeling that had been present all morning continued on the race course.

I have posted a map of the course. From the start of the race, we head straight on Epcot Center Drive, and then proceed on the ramp to World Dr. The course was so congested here that I was ready to scream. The combination of a very full race (27,000+people) and a narrowing course caused me some major problems. While I used the Galloway method to complete the Goofy Challenge over this weekend, I run quite a bit faster than many of the folks I was 725161_1015_0002corralled with. I was walking because I simply couldn’t get by people, not because I wanted to. By mile 5, we were in the Magic Kingdom, where I dropped off my tech shirt to my mom near the castle, and moved along the course.

I finished this race strong, but disappointed and frustrated that I felt stifled by the crowd. My finish time was 2:45:05, which was my goal actually. I was excited and frustrated to think that I could have easily run that race a lot faster had I not been held back by the thick crowd of runners.

The rest of the day was spent sleeping, relaxing and refueling for the big day that was coming. My body felt pretty good for having run 13 miles, but my feet were a bit sore. Mom ordered us Outback, steaks and vegetables for dinner, and we took them back to the resort, sat by the pool and ate. After dinner that evening, I jumped in the hot tub for about 20 minutes to recover a bit. It was all the perfect combination, because the next day went splendidly…

More on the full marathon soon…

 

In the Words of Bruce Buffer…

Here We Go! I am currently sitting in the parking lot at Epcot. It is 3:14 am, and I am so ready to run this half marathon, it’s not even funny! I am so proud if myself for pushing hard enough to make the dream or running the Goofy a reality. When you work so hard for something, it makes the final experience so rewarding. But there are 2 things that are overwhelming me at the moment. The first is actually finishing all 39.9 miles with my body still intact, and the other is what I’m going to do when I get home from this. Training becomes such a huge part of your life, that’s it is super hard to be prepared for what to do next when it is finally finished.

As for now, I am going to go run…