Running from the Crib

Something quietly earth-shaking happened at my house this week: I took down the crib. For the uninitiated, disassembling a crib is a parental rite of passage roughly equivalent to sending a child off to college, but with more Allen wrenches and slightly less tuition-related panic.

Wynn, who’s now three, has reached a level of lankiness previously reserved for NBA rookies and particularly ambitious green beans. The child has sprouted so effectively that his toes threatened to claim squatters’ rights on the far end of the crib. Add to this our household tradition of “musical beds”—a nightly game in which children ignore both boundaries and physics by cramming themselves into whatever sleep surface seems most inconvenient for the adults—and you have a recipe for familial togetherness. Not long ago, I discovered Wynn and our ten-year-old squished together in the crib, as if it were a tiny vessel crafted entirely from teething bars and childhood memories.

And so, the crib came down. I thought I’d feel only joy at this new, baby-stuff-free era. Instead, it’s orbiting somewhere between minor liberation and “oh look, my heart’s leaking a little sadness.” I barely got to savor Wynn’s littlest days; a stroke took that easy glow and replaced it, temporarily, with medical charts and pill bottles. Now, suddenly, the “baby” part of our life is tiptoeing quietly (yet somehow loudly) toward the rear exit.

Let’s take stock for posterity:

  • Binkys: Nighttime only, thank you very much.
  • Pull-ups: Also nighttime only—we’re nothing if not selectively mature.
  • Bottles: Still appearing more often than I’d admit on a parent survey, but there is significant improvement.

There’s a thrill in being free of strollers and diaper bags. I haven’t wielded a stroller in a year, and I feel like I should get a merit badge—unless, of course, the destination is someplace immense and Disney-branded, at which point all bets (and dignity) are off.

Last week, Wynn cracked the code of pedaling a bike without the assist of training wheels, leaving me to marvel at his skill and quietly assess my insurance deductible. He’s officially a pro. Yet he still naps hard—truly, with the kind of dedication only the very young or the spectacularly elderly can muster.

He’s little, yes, but growing. I’m clutching remnants of babyhood like they’re the last snacks on a long road trip, but what’s left is precious. So, if you see me lingering in the toddler aisle at Target, looking misty-eyed at a bottle of baby shampoo, just know I’m not ready to let go. Not quite yet.

If childhood flies by, at least let it leave a trail of mismatched socks, bike helmets, and—just for a little longer—the echo of lullabies in a room where a crib once stood.

Just a few more days

20150216134520546There are many milestones in a pregnancy, and again, I don’t think they are talked about enough. The first is just getting that positive test. For some people, this takes a lot of time, energy, money, and for some it never happens. We were extremely fortunate, and it happened with little effort.

The next milestone is the end of the first trimester, when the chance of miscarriage decreases to something like 7%. Again, while my first trimester was rough, we met and exceeded this milestone easily.

In my opinion, as seldom talked about mile stone is the 24 week mark. Once you hit 24 weeks, the pregnancy is finally viable, and the baby could technically survive outside the womb. We are four short days away from this mark.

You would logically think that it should be all down hill from here. If something happens, your baby can be born. You are only 3 short months away from the birth. But there problem here is that the baby is only about one pound right now. That means that over the course of the next 16 weeks, The baby could gain somewhere between 4-7 more pounds, making the mom’s job even harder!

My current experience is that I continue to get hungrier and hungrier, but I have less and less space to hold anything extra. That’s good, because my baby is growing big and strong, but it is getting more uncomfortable every day. Even though I am feeling less and less like myself, I am very excited that our last ultrasound showed that we are having a little boy.

We are getting closer and closer, but for an expectant mama, it seems like it is taking WAY TO LONG!