January was brutal. While I had very rewarding moments, it was also one of the worst months in my 30 years of existence. Getting to spend the holidays with Chas and the animals was wonderful. It confirmed to me that I am ready to co-habitate and be a wife, which is the plan for later this year obviously. Then I flew to Florida to take on the biggest challenge of my life: 48.6 miles over the course of 4 days. I completed the challenge with flying colors and got to spend time with friends while doing it. I came back to California, and quickly found myself in a bout of depression, not particularly loving my job at the moment, lonely, and with not much to look forward to until the wedding… 6 months away.

Friday, the last day of January, was one of the worst days of my life. As you may know, I have two cats and two dogs. Lucy and Milton, our English bulldogs, are such good dogs. I just love them to death. Rock and Roll, the cats, have been with me since I was in college. I literally don’t know my adult life without them. Friday Roll died. My heart is just broken. Rock and I have never been without him in the 9 1/2 year they have been alive.

He was the best cat, loved kitty treats, snuggling with his mommy, and playing bubbles. The minute I sat down, he was on my lap, most likely with a paw on my laptop track pad. Roll never met anyone that he didn’t like, and everyone loved him too. He always met me at the door, looking for a way to get outside, and when unsuccessful would follow me around until I sat down, just to cuddle with him of course.

There are moments when I don’t know what I am going to do without him. There are moments that is seems like Rock feels the same way. I am beside myself. My life will certainly never be the same.

Rest in peace Rolly. I love you to the moon and back sweet boy. Here’s hoping that February brings better things and a new mood.