Category Archives: My Life

The Long Arduous Journey

IMG_357438 weeks… That is how far along I will be tomorrow morning. Baby has decided to grow by leaps and bounds since my last post, and I am now measuring over 40 weeks, even though we have not reached that milestone week yet. Life has gotten significantly harder since week 30… ah those were the good ole days!

I can’t walk anymore, because I have so much nerve pain in my pelvic area and legs. Oh, and not to mention a nasty limp when I do walk. My hands and face are swollen. Not even my maternity clothes fit me anymore, and waistbands are out of the question. What does that leave for daily attire? Basically just muumuus. I pee about 3 times an hour, and go through a least 1 roll of toilet paper every 2 days. The baby is constantly moving, and burrowing his head into places that make my life a living hell.

But I still love the little guy, and I really can’t wait to meet him. Everything is pretty much ready for him to arrive. The nursery is done. We have an installed car seat. Hospital bags are packed. All attending parties are on call in case of something happening at any hour of the day. I am pretty much just counting down the days now.

My days seem very long as a person who works from home. Like I have said before on here, I am so lucky to be able to do that, but when you feel miserable often, the days tend to drag on a bit. So what did I do? I started a calendar of what I am going to do everyday until he is born. Here are a few great example:

June 14th- Clean out kitchen cabinets
June 18th- Vacuum and dust the baby’s room, Wash all the curtains in the house
June 23rd- Appointment with Dr. Fort, Clean the bathroom

Exciting, I know. Now, if I can actually get any of these accomplished, that is a totally different story, but I am sure as hell going to try!

The hardest part of all of this is that I have been having urges to run. Like CRAZY urges. Part of this running year, or most of this running year has been spent not running. That’s ok. I have to grow a little baby, and that is much more important right now. But wow, I can’t wait to get back out there. And best of all, I have a really great jogging stroller to try out too!

 

Three Fourths of the Way

The kitty already loving on his baby.

When you are running a marathon, you have a lot of time to compute things in your head, assuming you are still conscious enough to do it. I love math, so attempting to calculate what percentage of a race I have left is sort of a regular in my repetriore of things to think about while running.

Naturally, as my pregnancy has progressed, I tend to do the same thing. We hit the 3rd trimester about a week and a half ago, which was huge. The chance of baby surviving outside of the womb is about 90% now, which is so encouraging, especially since it takes 6 full months for him to even be viable in there.

As of Saturday, I will be able to say that we are 3/4th of the way done! And if you have seen any of my other posts throughout my pregnancy, you know that I am certainly looking forward to the end, not because I get to meet my little guy (although I am excited about that), but because I have been fairly miserable my entire pregnancy. Every day it is something else, and I tend to have more bad days that good. I literally couldn’t walk almost the entire weekend because I was having such bad muscle (stretching) pain in my groin. It feels like someone is stabbing me with a knife, NO JOKE!

It’s funny that my little guy is now on sort of a schedule, even pre-birth. He always kicks me a few times between 7-7:30 in the morning, before Chas’ alarm goes. He is the first to let me know that I am hungry. In the evening when Chas gets home, he always let’s me know that he is aware of it, and best of all, he likes music now. I have been playing a variety of things for him, but so far is favorite song is Crimson and Clover. It is pretty cool to go through, but all the while painful.

As we continue to get closer to delivery day, and I get larger and larger, the excitement and fear grows. He will be here soon, and there is still so many things to do, trips to take, and moments to remember. It’s going to be a fun ride.

Why the events of 2014 are making my 2015 even better

I am usually a very sentimental person around this time of year. I like to reflect on the past year, but I love looking forward to what the next year will hold for me. This year has been a little bit different than normal. I haven’t really felt that way this year, for multiple reasons of which I thought I would share with you.

dsc_8518 (1)Reason #1: I got married!
That was of course a major life changing event, and something that I had been hoping for for a very long time. There is a level of satisfaction that comes with marking that milestone off you list of things to accomplish in the future. The fear of being alone is long gone, and I think that is the void that was filled more than the need to have a diamond ring and a fancy wedding dress. I couldn’t be happier about the path my love life has taken. Having a witness to all the good and bad that we have to wade through year after year is totally worth the heartbreak and pain you go through in your dating life.

Reason #2: I have a home!
This is hard to explain, but every place that I have lived (Cleveland, Parsons, San Jose) has never felt like where I was going to stay. Something inside of me always said that it was just a temporary stop on my way to my final location. Because I always had that in the back of my head, I also was extremely reluctant to completely unpack. I put stuff away, but I never made it my own. When I moved into Chas’ house back in May, there was a sense of relaxation in placing everything where it needed to go. I finally felt like the space was mine, and not just a stepping stone. I am sure this isn’t where we will live for the rest of our lives together, but for now, it is perfect for a newly married couple, 2 English bulldogs and a tuxedo cat.

Reason #3: I’m having a baby!
First comes love, then comes marriage. Well we have almost completed the final step of this school yard rhyme. So many people have said something to the affect of, “Man, you guys didn’t wait long!” We have been together for 7 years and were smart enough and responsible enough to wait until we were married to get pregnant, and now they are hassling us because we got pregnant three months after we got married! Suck it people! At least this baby will have two unbelievably committed parents in a loving relationship… I tell you. You just can’t win.

Reason #4: I don’t have to worry about my weight for the first 8 months of the year!
This has actually been a tough thing for me to comprehend. I am a fairly fit person, as can be deduced from the name of this blog, and telling yourself that it is ok to see extra pounds show up on the scale is not a easy mind switch. Of course I want to stay healthy and fit for my baby, but knowing that most of this year will be spent at a higher weight than I am used to is sort of a relief! My fitness goals are complete different from every other year of my life, and that is comforting, relaxing, and almost a bit satisfying.

Reason #5: I have new family members!
Friends that started the year as just my friends have quickly become family to both Chas and me. In January, I ran one of the toughest series races of my life, the Dopey Challenge (see previous posts for more information). My friends Darren, Bruce and Julie ran with me. Not only was that another life changing experience that happened in 2014, but it brought us extremely close together. They are now my family, and I have been lucky enough to get to spend quite a bit of time with Julie and her daughters in San Diego this year. I am so excited to be part of Darren and Bruce’s wedding in February, along with running the Glass Slipper Challenge with them and Julie at Walt Disney World that same weekend. As always, it will be epic!

My new extended family! Love them all!

Combine all 5 of these things into a person’s new year, and you have almost a perfect year on the horizon. I am sure there will be bumps in the road, but remembering all the good things about 2014 and the special things that are coming are sure to keep me focused on making 2015 the best year of my life… and my husband’s life… and my little lemon sized fetus’ life!

On to the next one! Cheers!

One down, Two to go

We made it through the first trimester! Yay! Let me tell you, it wasn’t easy. From nausea to food aversions, cramps to complete and total exhaustion, I… WE, have been through quite a bit. Chas has been a trooper through it all. He has taken over almost all the house duties, because I simply don’t have the energy to do anything. It seems to be getting better, but I have days when I am just not sure anything will get done.

How cute is that?!?

How cute is that?!?

When you envision getting pregnant, you picture the positive test, the elation of telling your closest family and friends, and maybe a little morning sickness, which you are fairly certain won’t happen to you. No one tells you about the flatuence, the exhaustion, the ten MILLION times you will have to pee, or the smells that will immediately make you run to put your face in the toilet (like the pulled pork I came home to one evening. OMG, I am getting sick just thinking about it.) Unless you really dive in and do your research, which you won’t do unless you are obsessed with getting pregnant or find out that your pregnant, this is stuff you don’t really hear about. People don’t ask you about how you are as the mother. They ask to see the ultrasound picture, or what size the baby is in terms of fruit that week (we are up to a peach currently). They could care less about the fact that your pelvic bone constantly aches and that your pants don’t fit anymore. Well folks if you want the truth, come to me!

So far, pregnancy sucks! Don’t get me wrong. I am completely and totally in awe of the fact that my body will take the grilled cheese sandwich and tomato basil soup I had for lunch and turn it into a human, but it really is not a very fun process so far. But, like a good mom-to-be, I have been reading up. According to the literature, I am almost out of the woods, as most of the books say that the 2nd trimester brings about calm, less pee, and overall less “I just want to kill myself now” symptoms.

Well let me just tell you universe, I am waiting…

10 weeks in and still going strong

Note to readers: this was written on Thanksgiving day, but is just being published because we feel we are now far enough along to let people know our good news.

Well, we have almost made it through the first trimester! YIPPEE!!

Wow, it has not been easy! I have had more morning sickness, more nausea, and more terrible feeling days than any expectant momma should EVER have to deal with. From about week 6 to week 9, I don’t remember doing much but sleeping and complaining, which my husband was wonderful about dealing with. Anything I needed, he was there to help with. I couldn’t be more thankful for him and his willingness to get me through all of this. He even thinks of things that are silly, but are very good points, like working on my laptop with it sitting directly on my lap, or walking down the stairs without using the hand rail… he is just the cutest sometimes.

So here we are, in week 10. Our baby is now the size of a kumquat, which I have only ever seen on the Food Network. I head to the doctor for my first appointment on December 16th, and I can hardly wait. Let’s get this baby stuff on a roll! I want to make sure everything is ok, that I am doing all the right things, and that this baby is growing the way it is supposed to. I already have a nice little belly on me, let me tell ya! Fortunately, I have only gained about 2 lbs. so far, which I guess is about right for a person my size.

The maternity pants were bought last week… oh boy was that a tough thing to do… but they are SOOOO comfortable! Totally worth the money spent. I sort of feel like once we get through our first appointment, and through the holidays that it will be time to turn on baby mode. I am hesitant to buy anything yet, as we definitely don’t want to jump the gun prematurely. Things can always go wrong, and it would be a lot more painful with visual reminders if something did happen.

It also never escapes my mind at how lucky Chas and I are. Some people try forever, and it never happens for them. We tried for 3 months, and here we are! Here go the hormones… I cry at everything by the way! This baby is going to be the luckiest baby in the whole world! Between us and its grandparents, this child is going to be so spoiled, and I am sure it will be the sweetest baby ever. It has the most caring father, and a mother that worries about everything that will make sure that it always has what it needs.

I’m sure my next update will be after my appointment, so look for something soon!

Another new stage is upon us

Note to Readers: This post was written on 11/2/2014, but was published once I felt it was safe to start telling people about “the news”.

 

Something totally amazing has happened. I thought it was tough to come to grips with the fact that I was actually married and living with another person, but last Wednesday, “coming to grips” brought on a whole new meaning.

I’m pregnant! That sentence can be terrifying, joyful, and nerve-wrecking all in the same sentence! It’s still sinking in that I am growing another human in my body. I am not just living for myself any more. Running, driving, eating… it all affects someone else now. Not only do I have to change my way of thinking, but I have to change my way of living.

Fortunately I am, in general, a very healthy person. I don’t drink, and never have. I do my best to get exercise daily, and while I don’t eat perfect, I am not at the drive-thru every day. My biggest changes are cutting out caffeine, getting more fiber and fruits and vegetables, and just listening to my body. I generally don’t like to take naps, but I am giving into the urge these days.

I didn’t have any symptoms when I decided to take the test, but for some reason just had a hunch I need to take one. Chas and I had been trying, as we are both in our 30’s, and I was desperately afraid that it might not happen for one reason or another. We got very lucky, and believe me, we are so grateful for the opportunity to be parents. That, unfortunately, doesn’t make it any less scary!

babyI have been feeling pretty good so far! I’ve had a little trouble sleeping lately, and the amount of bloat I have had to deal with is a bit ridiculous! A few headaches, some cramping, and the overall fear of gaining weight, but other than that, I am doing very well. Baby T is going to have a great home for the next 35 weeks… check that, the next 18 years, 35 weeks.

I really am excited about this change, and to start a family myself. I’m excited to see my dad as a grandfather, and my mom as a grandma. I am excited to bring our two families together again, just a year later to celebrate a new member of the family, and to feel all the love that I know they will all bring to us and our new baby. I’m excited for baby clothes and baby shoes, uncles and aunts, blankies and pacifiers. I’m even excited for breastfeeding, sleepless nights and dirty diapers. This is the dream, the thing I wanted my whole life: a family.

Lots of changes will be happening, and I am super excited to see where life is taking us.

 

Started from the bottom

Well let me just start by saying that for a running blog, this is pretty pathetic. I can’t tell you the last time I posted about running… until today of course.

I have run one 5k, one 10k, one half marathon and two full marathons so far this year. To be honest, I am not happy with that, as I would like to have run many more. My last marathon was at the end of April. It was quickly followed by my biggest work event of the year, The Preppy Awards, a move half way across America, a wedding, 7 weeks of work away from my family back in California, and the death of my grandmother. That brings us to October 15th. Since that marathon on April 27th, I have run 12 times. TWELVE! I can’t even call myself a runner with those numbers! And honestly, I feel like a disgrace.

Here’s the problem. I am scared. I am scared to run. How dumb does that sound?!? What if it hurts or I have to walk? What if someone I know sees me and thinks I run like an idiot? (BTW that wasn’t something I had to worry about in California, because I had absolutely no friends and knew no one.) I’ve been using excuses like I can’t find my fuel belt, or I just took a shower and don’t want to take another one. I have lots of work to do is always one that won’t go away.

I’ve been getting up early to do it this week, and I still haven’t convinced myself to take the plunge. Pathetic. When my grandma was still alive the last few years, she wore a brace because her hip wouldn’t stay in the socket. I always said to myself that I was running because she couldn’t. Now that she is in heaven that doesn’t apply anymore. In California I used to see hummingbirds on my run, and I knew it was my grandpas making sure I got my run done safely. I realize this is probably all hubbub, but it always made me feel better to think about. I don’t think there are any hummingbirds in Hays, so who is going to keep me safe?

Chas and I lost a friend of ours last week. We met him and his wife at Disney World, and I was fortunate enough to get to spend some time with them on subsequent trips to the World. At 37 he was diagnosed with stomach cancer and it took him within 18 months. That is barely older than we are. Jonathan was a wonderful guy, and from what I can tell, I am sure he never met an enemy. What is my point in writing about Jonathan? I am scared to run, and his wife just lost her husband. SERIOUSLY?!? I am a complete pansy.

As I sit here writing this tonight, I had the privilege of watching the Royals sweep the Orioles to make it to the World Series. They are going to win the whole thing. What to know how I know? One of Chas’ best friends, who was also only about 37 to my knowledge, died almost a year ago of Leukemia. The connection? Travis was the biggest Royals fan you have ever met, so it is only fitting that he guide them directly to the World Series and get what he always wanted. After a 29 year drought, they made it to the big show. To come full circle, if after 29 years of not making it to the World Series the Royals can do it, I can run again after a few months break.

I know that I have been writing a lot about death lately, but in times of unrest I believe we learn the most about ourselves. I’m not really a pansy, and I know that. For pete’s sake! I ran 48.6 miles over the course of 4 days at the beginning of the year. I’m going to get back out there… tomorrow.

Life begins now

dsc_8521It seems like life has finally slowed down a bit. Since summer began, so many things have happened that weren’t just little. They were life changing. Back on Memorial Day weekend, I moved halfway across the United States to my new home in Hays, Kansas. Shortly there after, my boyfriend of seven years and I got married… at a Cincinnati Reds game (Best Day of My Life, by the way). Over the course of the next two months after that, I spend about seven weeks in California for work, which basically resulted in nothing getting done. Long story, but I met some great people and it showed me how ready I was to finally be with my family.

My Grandma Elsie at 91. She smile was infectious.

Once I got back to Kansas, there wasn’t much resting going on. About two weeks later, my grandmother, Elsie Mae Glassner, died at age 93. She lived a wonderful life, and even when we knew it was close to time for her to pass, she couldn’t figure out why nobody could make her feel better. She was convinced she would live forever. She was an amazing woman and tougher than nails. My grandfather died 19 years ago, and since then, she lived through 2 knee replacements, a hip replacement, a hole in her bowels which caused her to have to get a colostomy, breast cancer, chemotherapy and a mastectomy, multiple falls and congestive heart failure. Grandma was the sweetest woman you ever met, and her smile is something I will never forget.

The best part about grandma is that my mom is a lot like her: smiles like her, and is the toughest woman I’ve ever met. To know that I have that in my blood line is something that I don’t take lightly. I am sure that my grandpa was happy to finally have her back. They loved each other very much, and they are both missed.

We finally arrived back home to Kansas last Tuesday for what seems like it could be an extended period of time. I found myself saying, “Ok, what now?” Everything has been so busy the last few month. It’s hard to finally take a breath, look around and say, “Ok. I can get back to normal.” I haven’t had time to get into a routine, but that is definitely my goal over the next few weeks. I have been shuffling my time between work work and house work. It’s actually a really tough thing to do, because my office is on Pacific Time. I like working first thing in the morning, but then I find myself working till 8-9pm because they are still in the office until then! It seems like the balance is to switch back and forth between work stuff and home stuff. If someone has a better way, I would love to hear it!

Anyway, it’s nice to finally feel like our life can begin now. There will always be things popping up that knock us out of our “normal”, but a few weeks of calm are exciting to have in front of us.

Final Preparations

It’s been almost an entire year since Chas got down on one knee in Santa Cruz and asked me to marry him. That was a really great day. We will have been engaged for 360 days on our wedding day. We are so excited!

Chas is getting a little annoyed with me. Seems like every day I am ordering more stuff trying to finish up gift lists or finalizing outfits, etc. It’s all coming together, even down to an argyle bow tie for Milton bulldog…

photo1

While running has still been put on the back burner, I have been lifting almost every day with Chas, and I have to admit, my arms are looking pretty good. I feel comfortable with my body for my wedding day, which is a good thing. (Note: I say that as I am sitting here eating an entire box of Cheez-Its… Oh well.)

download

Anyway, it’s going to be a very fun few days for us, but my life is getting crazy starting today… Let’s run down the series of events, shall we?

June 20th- Today, besides the ton of work I have to do, someone is coming to buy our couch, which I have to get ready. I also have to price everything for what I have going on tomorrow.

June 21st- Having a garage sale! We have a ton of stuff from combining our households, so we are sharing it with the community, for a small fee.

June 22nd- Chas’ camp starts. His nephew, Maximo, is coming to stay with us for a few days, and I am hoping to being painting our living room.

June 23rd-25th- I will be preparing for the wedding, working (of course) and helping with random camp duties.

June 26th- FLYING TO California! I am going to try to get a few good days and meetings in before I finally take some time off for the wedding. Of course if you know about where I live, it is a challenge traveling, because the nearest airport is about 4.5 hours away.

June 27th-July 2nd- Dog sitting… in California. Flying back to Kansas on the 2nd.

July 3rd- Leaving for the wedding week. We will be spending the 4th at Chas’ parents, then heading to my parent’s on the 5th… A 9-10 hour drive depending on the day.

After the 3rd, there is a lot of last minute wedding preparations that will be going on. I am so excited to spend the time with my family, and I sure it will be one of the best times in our lives.

More to come I am sure…

When one door closes

mapWell, here I sit on my last night in my apartment in California. On my last night alone as a single person. Wow, what a weird thing to say. My last night living alone, hopefully forever.

I have this weird urge to cry, not because I’m sad, but because I sort of have graduation goggles. You know, like when you were finishing up high school, getting ready to graduate and you completely forget that you were picked on, beat up, or ignored completely every day for four straight years. My California experience has made me a richer, more well-rounded person. The naive little Midwestern girl has now be exposed to the real world, and I have made it through to the other side.

I moved out here for a lot of reasons, and I can’t help but think it was absolutely the right decision. I am coming out of this a better employee in a job that I enjoy so much. I have found so many strengths and turn weaknesses into things of the past. I have become  a reality show producer, an event planner, a photo editor. I have been involved in so many wonderful things over the past two years with Prep2Prep. I have dedicated my life to the brand. I love this company, I just know that something great is going to happen for us.

For years now I have worked like a dog. My career has always been number one. I am so excited to finally have a reason to make work number 2. Prep2Prep is allowing me the opportunity to do what I love, what I am good at, and take care of my family at the same time. I have sacrificed two years with my puppy dogs, and now, I get to work from home and stay with them all day long.

There is a lot going on, and I still have to make it through three days of work and a 24 hour road trip halfway across the United State, but moving out of my apartment is taking one step closer to my dream. The days to come will be so special, and I can’t wait for new challenges both personally and professionally.

Keep Moving Forward…